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The Best Sex Toys for Men – 2020

Best Sex Toys for Men

The best collection of sex toys for Men in 2020

On this post we will give you the best collection of sex toys and goodies—you know, masturbation sleeves, cock rings, and yes, prostate stimulators—you need for stronger and more satisfying orgasms. The ultimate 2020 sex toys collection for men.

The best sex toys for men are, quite possibly, the best way to elevate your life right now. As the coronavirus pandemic continues, we’re all anxious, bored, and horny. Masturbation is a bright spot one-to-seven times a day. Know what makes it brighter? Sex toys. Yes, for men. Give your over-washed hands a break, and your body a whole new sensation.

The first step in sex toys is getting past whatever’s kept you from using a sex toy—alone or with a partner—up until now: a mildly Puritan shame, the hassle of cleaning up, the fact that the best sex toys for men kinda look like alien appendages. Or maybe it’s the misguided notion that “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” Following the Malcolm Gladwellian 10,000-hour theory, you feel like an expert in the field. A harder, stronger, and more life-affirming orgasm sounds nice, but how much room for improvement could there really be?

A lot. The best sex toys do for masturbation what hot sauce does for a couple of perfectly over-medium eggs—take a great thing to whole new heights. Sex toys do things you and your partner can’t, no matter how advanced your yogic practices. And unless you’re Sting, you can’t make your penis vibrate on its own. You’re also going to struggle—by virtue of the limitations of the human anatomy—to stimulate your own prostate, a.k.a. the male G-spot, while simultaneously working the front. That’s where prostate massagers and vibrating butt plugs come in.

But we’re jumping ahead. Even if you’re not ready to explore self-guided butt stuff, plenty of sex toys will kick-start your masturbation game from good to great to apologizing-to-the-neighbors. Some of these toys are also great to use with a partner, if lucky enough to be quarantined with a sexual partner. And if not, these endless days of social distancing are the ideal moment to get fresh, and maybe a little weird, with your self-sex. Here are the best sex toys for men out there.

Fleshlight GO Torque

While you’re likely aware of the infamous Fleshlight, the first and most well-known masturbating sleeve, you might not know that the manufacturers came out with what they call the Go Torque. It’s bigger than the original, with an Internal length of 7 inches and diameter of 0.5 inches there is ample room for your penis, it will most likely cover the entire shaft. Being transparent it is more discrete to store and doesn’t have the look of a typical Fleshlight, which isn’t necessarily something you want a casual hookup to stumble on.

Vibrating Reusable Cock Ring

The Vibrating reusable cock ring does its job simply, and it does its job well. The vibrations are strong. It fits snuggly against the shaft of your penis, but it’s not too tight. The more bulbous top of the toy applies pressure and stimulates your partner’s clitoris. It feels good for you and everyone involved. Pro tip: If you finish first and your partner hasn’t, take the vibrating cock ring and and place it on your middle and ring fingers while you finger her. She’ll likely appreciate the vibrations.

Alive 10 Function Remote Controlled Magic Egg Pink

Alive 10 Function Remote Controlled Magic Egg Pink

Is the Alive Magic Egg vibrator going to change your sex life? No. Will you use it to masturbate every single time? Absolutely not. But for an affordable price, this super-duper remote controlled magic egg can become one of many tools in your jerk box to switch things up when the old-fashion way starts growing stale.

Aneros MGX Syn Trident Prostate Massager

While the Trident prostate massager is a bit pricey, it’s my favorite prostate massager currently on the market. Insert it and set it up to send vibrations exactly where you want to be stimulated. Instantaneous sexual gratification with the trident prostate massager, experience the most pleasurable stimulation in your behind.

Gaia Biodegradable Eco Bullet Vibrator Blue

The biodegradable eco bullet vibrator, is a little bit of something for both you and her. Slide it in and enjoy vibrations that go beyond your wildest imaginations. The result is amazing with a a loaded feeling that will make you ready for harder and longer sex sessions. The bullet not only vibrates but will also stimulate the clitoris during insertion.

Inflatable Vibrating Butt Plug Black

The inflatable vibrating is the only butt plug on the market that can be inflated to fit into the anal reagions and stimulates simulates rimming or “analingus” using vibrating motions. While it doesn’t feel as pleasurable as a partner’s tongue, it still feels pretty damn good, and doesn’t require you to ferociously clean out beforehand. While not necessary with a partner, I highly recommend you do. It’s also a simple entry for men who want to explore anal play, but aren’t quite ready to shove a dildo in there yet.

Loving Joy Real Feel Male Masturbator – Pleasure Stroker

More than any other masturbation sleeve on the market, the pleasure stroker, real feel masturbator actually feels like the inside of a vagina. In fact, it’s 3D scanned from the winner of the world’s most beautiful vagina contest, which, yes, is a real thing. Like a human vagina (yes, we acknowledge that’s a creepy way to begin any sentence!), the lifetime use pleasure stroker starts off tight, but after entry it slowly and naturally expands.

Optimum Power Masturball Male Vibrator

Optimum Power Masturball Male Vibrator

At first glance, the Masturball male vibrator is confusing. But give it a go with its 10 setting vibrations and sensitive tickler pads and you will be exposed to a customisable stroking experience the likes of which you have never enjoyed before. An easy to use and easy to clean, it can replicate the actions of a hand, deepthroat and vagina all in one.

Loving Joy Anal Love Beads Black

More expensive doesn’t always mean better quality, and for anal beads, you really don’t need anything that special. These love joy anal beads from the Pleasure fun toys basics and classic do exactly what they’re supposed to do. They feel pleasurable while inside of you, and you get that euphoric release when they “pop” out of you one by one.

22 Sex Toys That Can Help You Try Anal for the First Time

Anal play can feel great, especially when you have the right toys.

11 Anal Sex Toys That Can Help You Try Anal for the First Time

ICYMI: Anal play can be a whole lotta fun. But it can also be pretty intimidating for first timers, which is why we tapped experts for their advice on how to get started—and how to get the most out of it. Here’s what they have to say.First of all, let’s take a minute to appreciate why butt stuff can be so awesome.

For starters, the anal region is rich in sensitive nerve endings that can make it a pleasure gold mine. And since the tissue between the rectum and vagina is so thin, sometimes anal pressure stimulates the front wall of the vagina, where the G-spot is. That makes it a surprisingly effective way to get that elusive G-spot stimulation. And if you’ve got a prostate, anal play can be a great way to target the “P-spot,” a walnut-sized gland inside the male pelvis between the bladder and rectum.When you’re going to try the big A, experts recommend taking it slow and starting with a little finger or mouth play.

Lisa Finn, a sex educator at the sex toy boutique Babeland, says relaxation is key to enjoying anal play. “The rectum holds a lot of tension,” she tells SELF. “We naturally tense up when something new is introduced to that area. So if you’re feeling a bit anxious about anal play, those muscles may not be as willing to open to allow for penetration.”

You can start by stimulating the outside of your anus with your fingers or a vibrating toy. The external stimulation alone may feel great, so you can leave it at that, or continue to relax as you work your way up to penetration.

If you’re with a partner, Finn suggests asking them to stimulate the area with their tongue or give you a relaxing full-body massage before making any other moves. Let your partner know what feels good, what doesn’t, and what sensations you’d like to explore further. Communication is key.

And if something hurts, stop. Finn says anal sex should never hurt or feel uncomfortable. She also warns against using numbing creams. “Numbing creams [can temporarily dull] pain receptors, which are our body’s way of telling us something is not right,” she says. “You can potentially create lasting damage to your body if you continue to force your body through something it is trying to warn you is not OK.”And definitely use lubrication.

Since the anal region doesn’t create its own lubrication, using lube is a must—and according to Finn, saliva won’t cut it. Finn recommends using a thick, long-lasting silicone-based lube that will reduce friction between bodies and toys, and are also great to use with condoms. Which brings me to an important point: If you’re sharing toys with a partner, or using toys both anally and vaginally, it’s essential that you use a fresh condom between each new insertion.

But wait! If you’re using silicone toys (which some of those included below are), you should opt for a water-based lubricant. Silicone-based lubes erode silicone toys, which means you’ll have to replace them more frequently. You can still pair water-based lubricant with condoms, and you’ll still want to switch an old condom out for a new one between insertions.Ready to play? Here are 11 expert-recommended, customer-approved toys to try for first-time anal play.

You’ll probably notice that these all have one thing in common: a flared base. And that’s deliberate. Not to freak you out, but it’s possible for things to get lost in your rectum, which is why you should never use anything as an anal sex toy that doesn’t meet this criteria.

And one last thing: Each toy’s instructions vary. Check with the retailer to see what material the toy is made of, which lubes it pairs best with, and how to best clean it.

1. Anal Balloon (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Totally filling desire pleasure for experts!
Small and flatly he glides fastly in your rear desire region. And then pump him if requested size, until he fills you TOTALLY… From smooth latex. Handy pump with pressure control valve.

Anal Balloon (PLEASU

2. Loving Joy Anal Love Beads Black (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Increase your orgasms with these sturdy yet flexible jelly anal beads! These smooth jelly beads will feel amazing when you pop them in vaginally or anally. Start small and work your way to the top for a more filling sensation. These beads are perfect for foreplay or use during intercourse.

Loving Joy Anal Love Beads Black (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

3. Loving Joy Triple Ripple Anal Beads-Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Succumb to anal pleasure with the Triple Ripple Anal Beads. Crafted from quality, hypoallergenic silicone these velvety smooth beads increase in size allowing you to gradually explore previously forbidden pleasures. Heat them up or cool them down for added sensory play fun. Complete with robust pull cord for safe retrieval.

Loving Joy Triple Ripple Anal Beads-Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOY

4. Rocks Off Bubbles Petite Sensations Anal Beads (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Petite size ideal for beginner anal play, Velvety soft, ultra-smooth body-safe silicone. Pinpointed, targeted vibrations. 3 vibration speeds and 4 patterns for varying sensations, 100% waterproof and fully submersible.

Rocks Off Bubbles Petite Sensations Anal Beads (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

5. Expanding Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Expandable anal plug with tapered tip, with an anal anchor opens and spreads for the ultimate full feeling.

Expanding Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

6. Loving Joy Finger Fun Small Butt Plug Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOY)

Get yourself some Finger Fun from Loving Joy! A great toy if you’re new to anal play or to warm up before anal sex. This small jelly plug is small and smooth with a ring at the base for you to insert your finger to give control when you really need it.

Loving Joy Finger Fun Small Butt Plug Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOY)

7. Aneros MGX Syn Trident Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Popular MGX Syn shape enhanced with new Trident series innovation, with ribbed Stem for more defined anal stimulation. Modified arms and tabs for external stimulation and provides moderately focused stimulation and comfort.

Aneros MGX Syn Trident Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

8. Jessica Rabbit Double Bunny Vibrator (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

The Jessica Rabbit Ultimate Duo is two bunnies in one for double the fun! The shaft is filled with an abundance of squirmy pearls which feel amazing inside as they rotate and move around. You get 6 rotating speeds so you can really massage yourself into submission! Two vibrating bunnies either side of the shaft give you simultaneous clitoral and anal stimulation – and each has six functions to enjoy.

Jessica Rabbit Double Bunny Vibrator (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

9. Rocks Off Red Temptations Couples Kit (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Sensory couples play kit: RO 120 and R0 60 Truly Yours bullets (batteries included). Explore and enjoy discrete precision anal stimulation, Ergonomically designed sensory textured vibrating C ring. 

Rocks Off Red Temptations Couples Kit (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

10. Spectrum Ribbed Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

The Spectrum range are suitable for both anal and vaginal use. a hypoallergenic and hygienic glass dildo which is easy to clean

Spectrum Ribbed Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

11. Spectrum Nubby Textured Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Loving Joy Nubby Textured Glass Dildo that will satisfy your sexual adventures. The Spectrum range are suitable for both anal and vaginal use.

Spectrum Nubby Textured Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

12. Spectrum Ribbed G-Spot Double Ended Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

The Spectrum range are suitable for both anal and vaginal use. Made from hypoallergenic material, the double ended dildo is hygenic and really easy to clean.

Spectrum Ribbed G-Spot Double Ended Glass Dildo (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

13. Furry Fantasy Red Fox Tail Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

The metal plug is easy to clean due to the smooth surface, is suitable for temperature play and can be used with water-, silicone- or oil-based lubricants. The product comes in a sealed clear bag placed inside a black drawstring bag.

Furry Fantasy Red Fox Tail Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

14. Svakom Primo Remote Control Warming Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Primo is designed with pinhole charging port, and it’s completely waterproof. Do it in the shower, in the bathtub, in your swimming pool, wherever you pleased. Primo is equipped with a heating core which can heat the vibrator up to about 38?/100.4? to provide a better satisfaction, especially during winter. Primo is made of environment friendly silicone, it past all the strict tests and reached high standard before going to the market.

Svakom Primo Remote Control Warming Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

15. Aneros MGX Trident Prostate Massager

The mechanism is simple, but extremely effective. With our products, a man can achieve strong, continuous full-body orgasms previously unattainable through conventional sexual techniques. These orgasms are so earth-shattering that they deserve a special nickname – The Super Orgasm, or as our enthusiasts prefer, The “Super-O.” A Super-O is entirely different from a traditional penile orgasm – it is characterized by pleasure starting from the lower abdomen that awashes the entire body in a state of bliss.

Aneros MGX Trident Prostate Massager

16. Aneros Progasm Red Ice Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Enjoy the look and feel of the popular Progasm in red! Made from FDA approved medical and food grade plastic, which has the same qualities as glass but a safer alternative as it remains unbreakable. As with all Aneros prostate massagers, the Progasm Red Ice is extremely versatile and beneficial to your sexual health, unlocking the latent sexual energy held within your prostate.

Aneros Progasm Red Ice Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

17. Aneros Vice 2 Silicone Rechargeable Remote Control Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Dual Motor Design, with magnetic charging and 18 Vibration patterns. A satisfying remote controlled prostate massager from pleasure fun toys. 

Aneros Vice 2 Silicone Rechargeable Remote Control Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

18. Loving Joy Silicone Pleasure Balls-Black (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

These Silicone Pleasure Balls are silky smooth to the touch, complete with internal clay balls which rattle internally to create vibrations. Additional pull cord for safe retrieval.

Loving Joy Silicone Pleasure Balls-Black (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

19. Aneros Vice (V-Series) Vibrating Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

You’ve been asking for it, and after careful research and development, it’s finally here! The first release of our V-Series (Vibrating) Line is shaking things up. This beauty is an evolution in prostate massage, built with the quality materials and craftsmanship you’ve come to expect from Aneros.

Aneros Vice (V-Series) Vibrating Prostate Massager (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

20. Loving Joy Silicone Pleasure Balls-Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

These Silicone Pleasure Balls are silky smooth to the touch, complete with internal balls which rattle internally to create vibrations. Additional pull cord for safe retrieval.

Loving Joy Silicone Pleasure Balls-Pink (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

21. Avant Pride Fluid Silicone Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Unique, lovingly crafted small batch artisanal plug. Tapered design for easy insertion. Sturdy base for safe play. Made from body safe Platinum cured silicone. Boilable.

Avant Pride Fluid Silicone Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

22. Avant Pride Power Play Silicone Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

Unique, lovingly crafted small batch artisanal plug. Tapered design for easy insertion. Sturdy base for safe play. Made from body safe Platinum cured silicone. Boilable.

Avant Pride Power Play Silicone Butt Plug (PLEASURE FUN TOYS)

‘Is your vibrator stopping you from enjoying sex?’

With the news that a supermarket will soon be stocking sex toys, bedroom gadgets have gone completely mainstream. Are we hooked?

Leanne* was 21 when she bought her first vibrator. It is sleek and made from soft-to-the-touch silicone. “It’s stone coloured, with a rose-gold button,” she explains. “It doesn’t look like a dick, it’s very classy.”

Growing-up in a village just outside Birmingham, she’d been single for two years when she took the train into the city centre one Saturday afternoon. “I remember feeling really matter-of-fact about it, as if I was going to have my car MOT-ed,” she laughs. At 21, Leanne had never had an orgasm. “But that was O-day. I was properly determined. I was going to buy the vibrator of my dreams and sort it out.”

She’d lost her virginity at 17 and by 21, had slept with a handful of guys, all of them people she’d been in short relationships with. She’d enjoyed sex, “but it was a different kind of enjoyment,” she explains. “I enjoyed the thrill of meeting someone, of seducing them or of them seducing me. The build-up excited me but I never actually had an orgasm.” It made foreplay uncomfortable and, she sighs, “pointless. I’d just lie there wondering what to do with myself, feeling weird and awkward. I felt like there was all this pressure on me to feel something that I just wasn’t feeling.”

As the years passed, Leanne began to worry about her missing orgasm. “I was disappointed every time I had sex, disappointed in myself rather than the other person. I felt the fact that I wasn’t coming was shameful; I didn’t want to tell anyone because my friends talked about it as if it happened for them every time.”

She finally opened up to her best friend. “The thing is, at the time, I’d never masturbated. My friend was great, she just said ‘of course you haven’t had an orgasm if you’ve never masturbated. You have to teach yourself what you find pleasurable. It’s about recognising a feeling and holding onto it. If you don’t know what that feeling is, then you’re going to struggle.’”

That Saturday, back at home, she unboxed her new vibrator and got work. “It took an hour before I finally felt this overwhelming…thing. Something my body was doing on its own, without me necessarily thinking about it or controlling it.” Big-O contractions were followed by a wave of pleasure, then a feeling of deep calm. “I was like ‘oh! So! I’ve had an orgasm.’ It was a great experience.”

Vibrators have been buzz-buzzing into our hearts since the Victorian era, when they were invented by doctors as a cure for female ‘hysteria.’ At the time it was thought that ‘hysteria’ (essentially, anxiety mixed with a whole host of other, incongruous symptoms like bloating) could be treated with orgasms. It’s a theory that Leanne can identify with: “I definitely felt less anxious thanks to having regular orgasms,” she says.

An illustration showing a woman clinging onto a giant vibrator in a Tarzan-inspired scene

But it was the launch of the Rabbit, in the late 1980s, which helped vibrators go mainstream. “For a long time most toys were fleshy, veiny, pink and obscene,” explains Stuart Nugent, who is the global brand manager for the Swedish designer sex toy brand LELO. “It put a lot of people off buying vibrators.” With its animal-shaped clitoral stimulator, though, the Rabbit seemed somehow friendlier than the toys which had gone before. In 1998 Sex and the City even dedicated an episode to it, signalling its shift from sex toy to cultural icon. 

With sex toys becoming seen as more mainstream, things started to change. “In the noughties, designers began to create more luxurious, design-focused products” Stuart explains. Fast forward to now and the global adult toys market is expected to exceed £22 billion ($29 billion) by 2020 – a growth which Stuart puts down, in part, to the fact that toys are now created to be desirable objects in their own right. He points out that in the past five to 10 years particularly, we’ve become much savvier consumers.

“We are now a lot more design-aware,” he says. “We want products which marry function with a sleek interface. That’s true of all of our gadgets, including the ones we take into our bedrooms.”

This drive for better design has resulted in a huge array of styles and price points. “In a normal vibrator, you’ll have an off-centre weight spinning around an axis. That’s what generates the sensation of a vibration,” explains Stuart. “But companies are now looking at different types of stimulation.” Stuart explains that the Sona, one of their newest products actually sends “inaudible sonic waves directly into the body”. The feeling is meant to be like having a small but bass-heavy speaker rumbling into your vagina. 

Professional sex-toy-tester Venus O’Hara (who owns around 500 vibrators and toys), also points to new toy The Womanizer: “It looks like an ear thermometer; you place it over your clitoris and it stimulates you without touching your clitoris by using air technology – almost like suction, but not too harsh.”

But this technology does not come cheap. You can expect to shell out £120 for each of them. But that’s nothing compared to a £1 million, diamond-covered vibrator – which is thought to be one of the world’s most expensive sex toys. If that sounds like a lot of cash to splash on getting off, then there’s always the ones available at your local supermarket. Yes, you read that right. This week, the supermarket chain Sainsbury’s announced they would be launching a range of affordable sex toys. But even at the more budget-friendly end of the market (the range will cost between £8 and £15), the pieces – in rose gold, blush and silver – look more like dinky sculptures than, to quote Leanne, ‘dicks’.

“I kept my vibe by my bed and used it every day,” says Leanne. “It felt like a really positive step in terms of my sexuality.” Seven years later, she uses the exact same vibe, a few times a week. But while the love is still there, she has started to wonder whether their “relationship” (her word) is impacting her ability to orgasm by other means. “Over the years I’ve realised that I can’t have an orgasm unless it’s using that exact vibrator, laying in the exact same position that I was in the first time. It’s like I’ve never cheated on my vibe.”

Now 28, she lives with her partner of five years. They’re happy and have a fulfilling sex life. “He’s totally fine with the vibe, we include it in foreplay. At first I thought he might feel emasculated, but it’s all good, apart from the fact that I’d love to experience an orgasm in a different way.” Despite much experimentation (“on my front, while having sex, me on top of him, with a range of different toys,”) which proved to be fun but somewhat frustrating, “I always have to revert back to ‘old faithful’ if I want to come.

“It’s almost as if I’ve achieved this milestone, but I haven’t been able to move forward, or experiment. I’m worried that I’ve become ‘hooked’ on that one vibrator.”

An illustration of a vibrator on the pillow next to a woman who looks at it with a glint in her eye

To be clear, according to the experts, this isn’t physically possible (more on this in a sec). But Leanne isn’t the only one to have become concerned about whether anything can compare with the quick-and-clinical power of the vibe. In fact, back in 2016 a condition called ‘Dead Vagina Syndrome,’ – basically a numbness after habitually using vibrators – went viral, despite the fact that it had no medical basis whatsoever. 

Dr Leila Frodsham, a spokesperson for the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists, explains: “If you can only orgasm in one position, using one sex toy, or with your hand, and you are perfectly happy, then there’s nothing to worry about. I see a lot of patients, though – men and women – who tell me that they want to experience orgasm in a different ways but can’t. That they feel their sex lives are becoming formulaic because they have to return to that one position and sensation every time.”

Women are able to achieve orgasm through a number of different methods. For many – around 37% according to one American-based study – stimulating the clitoris (a nub of nerve endings, found a centimetre or so in front of the vaginal opening) is necessary to climax, (although others can get there through penetration alone, while a few lucky ones, only need nipple stimulation). “Vibrators work through frequency and amplitude,” explains Dr Frodsham. They rapidly and intensely stimulate the clitoris and surrounding areas, meaning that arousal happens much more quickly than by other (manual or oral) methods. “And there’s no clinical evidence that using one leads to lessened sensitivity or any kind of physical ‘addiction’.”

But, she points out, it’s normal to become used to one sensation. “I see it most often in men with porn addiction,” she says. “They masturbate with their hand, sometimes for hours every day, which means that they find it difficult to climax when they’re having sex with a partner because it feels so different to what they’re used to. For a woman who uses the same vibrator every time, it’s a similar thing, your body becomes used to that one sensation, so new ones take longer to work, if they work at all.”

In these scenarios, she recommends spending six weeks letting your body get acquainted with different sensations. “Dial down the speed of a vibrator, or switch to a different model, which has different kinds of stimulation,” she says. “Reaching climax through a variety of different methods will mean that you’ll start to find it easier generally.” But it can take time. In fact, the first time you try a new type of stimulation might seem like slow going, but it might be worth it, if it means easy orgasms in the long run.

For 27-year-old Safia,* a vibrator hiatus seemed like the only solution after she realised that she was having trouble climaxing without it. “I tried to climax with just my hands but couldn’t get into it,” she explains. “I couldn’t conjure up any scenarios in my mind that would turn me on. Eventually I just got bored. I was single at the time but that experience really freaked me out. I was genuinely scared that using my vibrator every day was ruining my ability to have orgasms with a partner, or by myself.”

She began scouring the internet to see whether vibrator use could lead to lessened sensitivity. “There wasn’t a lot of information available and what was there was often really conflicting. I think a lot of literature which is meant to be positive about female sexuality can ignore the genuine concerns that some women have about being reliant on vibrators.”

Ultimately, she decided to retire her vibe for a month. “It was difficult at first; I’d been using it every day as a way to fall asleep – it just made me feel really relaxed.

“I had this amazing vibrator that cost £120. The first time I used it, it took like seven seconds and then I just lay there, thinking ‘Well, something’s left me.’ Literally, £120 to feel empty.

“During my month off, I actually had to move it away from my bed, otherwise I would have been too tempted to use it each night to help me drift off.”

An illustration of a hypnotised woman with the shape of a vibrator reflected in her eyes

Although it took a week or two, Safia soon got used to masturbating with her hand again. “I realised that I hadn’t been relying on my imagination any more but that masturbating had become purely physical, and that’s why I couldn’t build up to an orgasm like I’d been able to before.”

Venus had a similar experience before she became a sex toy tester. “There was definitely a time when I thought I couldn’t orgasm without one specific model,” she explains. “I tried other vibrators but it had to be this particular one.” She began writing a blog about sex and sex gadgets nine years ago. “Through experimentation and research, I realised that it was my mental techniques that I needed to work on, not just which toy I was using.”

She points out that rushing towards orgasm might, incongruously, mean that you lose touch with your fantasy life. “I think it’s good to allow your mind to wander and be guided by your fantasies — they’ll make the sensations more intense.” She used to masturbate between four and six times a day. “But now I do it just once, for between 45 minutes and an hour. It’s almost like a meditative practice.”

Dr Frodsham agrees that habit and biology are only really half of the story when it comes to sex. “I think the question of why someone can only climax using one particular method is important. And it often comes down to control. Control is a big part of sex and orgasm – a person who feels anxious about what’s going on with their body, or how they look to a partner, is unlikely to relax into sex.”

“We’re now expected to be very in control of our lives,” adds Dr Frodsham. “That doesn’t just switch off when it comes to the bedroom. And it can really stand in the way of someone fully experiencing sex.”

In this respect, vibrators can be a good thing. Basically, a vibe will get you aroused before your mind has a chance to step in and stress out. “Obviously, though, if you’re finding it difficult to climax without one, and would like to, then it’s a case of figuring out ways to get comfortable with losing control and letting your body do what it needs to do,” she adds.

Using a form of psychodynamic therapy, Dr Frodsham helps people to get to a position where orgasms come more easily. She also suggests reading erotic fantasies, such as those in the books by sex writer Nancy Friday and trying various masturbation techniques. Seeking a professional’s advice is something that Leanne has been considering. “I’ve thought about going on a vibe ‘diet’ but I feel like that means no orgasms for… I don’t even know how long. And it doesn’t seem worth it.”

Both Leanne and Safia are still vibrator fans. “Using the vibe has definitely improved my sex life,” says Safia. “But – and maybe this comes down to the fact that I have a new girlfriend – now that I only use it every-so-often, I feel like I’m getting to know myself better. I’m experimenting more and letting my mind wander more. Still, I’ve got no plans to throw it away,” she laughs, then shrugs, “I’m only human.”

*Some names have been changed to anonymise the personalities. 

This article was originally published on 25 October 2018. BBC

10 Top Tips For Cervix Penetration

Deep Sex Penetration And Cervical Orgasms
Deep Sex Penetration And Cervical Orgasms

What is Cervix Penetration

In addition to vaginal stimulation or clitoral stimulation, the cervix is also a pleasure zone that can lead to full blown orgasm. This is achieved with deep penetration through the vagina which will stimulate your cervix.

For those who have never experienced deep penetration before, or might have experienced it unexpectedly, you would be wondering how this can be stimulating or safe. So we have put together the best tips on cervix penetration and stimulation to help you understand and enjoy deep penetration without worry.

Getting The Most Pleasure From 6 Simple Sex Positions

Sex is one of the most intimate and pleasurable and is even more enjoyed with with a powerful orgasm. Achieve the most pleasure from simple sex positions, making a few tweaks to your sexual lifestyle and activity to enjoy even more powerful orgasms: alone or with a loved one.

Most Pleasure From Simple Sex Positions
Most Pleasure From Simple Sex Positions

When people want to spice up their sexual lifestyle, the option that usually comes to mind is to add a plethora of sexual positions to their arsenal. Develop acrobatic tendons and flexibility overnight and arrange their bodies in the most impossible contortions imaginable.

However, to improve your sexual lifestyle and enjoy sex more, there is no need to train as an olympic level acrobat. The most basic sexual positions when practised well and kept in rotation to keep things interesting will work well and often lead to heightened sexual pleasure and epic orgasms.

Sex is all about stimulation of the most sensitive areas and being able to relax and let go. This will lead to intense and satisfying sex. Being able to angle yourself in a sexual position so that you are stimulating the more sensitive areas will lead to more enjoyment of sexual encounters.

With greater pleasure; one will increase the likelihood of having orgasm and as often and quickly as possible. This allows you to get turned on and feel connected to your body and to your partner. So you do not need the entire encyclopedia of sexual positions and mastery of the Kama Sutra to achieve sexual pleasure.

The extra twist, acrobatic styles do not achieve a higher level of satisfaction than the simple sexual positions. Enjoy your sex with pleasure using these 6 simple sex positions.

Woman on Top

Women enjoy sex in this position because it allows them to control the speed and angle of thrust. They can make it more intense with faster deeper trusts or simple lean forward and reduce the intensity to their pace. To get into the woman on top position, you have to get on your knees and hug your partner, then slide in and out, as slowly or fast as you desire.

The woman on top also allows you to stimulate your G spot, in the most relaxing way possible. A feat that is harder to achieve unless you are using a g spot stimulating vibrator. Moderating the speed from slow to intense will allow you to get warmed up in your muscles to avoid cramps as well as get your clitoris stimulated and warmed up for more pleasure. You can jump the clitoral warm up with a rabbit vibrator to stimulate your clitoris as a sex aid.

The clitoris is a small nub that is right above the vaginal opening, and as you get turned on it will fill up with blood like the penis and become engorged in its own right. This makes it larger and drops lower into the path of the thrusting allowing it to be easily stimulated and providing a larger area for stimulation leading to epic orgasms. Getting aroused and getting your clitoris warmed up is very key to enjoying sex.

Want to push things a bit further with the woman on top position to better sexual pleasure from this simple sexual position. Try a little bit of mixing the woman on top position with a vibrating cock ring. The cock ring will serve to stimulate the clitoris directly whilst maintaining the erection of your partner for longer sexual activity. The woman on top allows you to control your sensations to better enjoy sexual pleasure.

Doggy Style

The doggy style, is a satisfying sexual position in which the partner enters you from behind. It allow for a tight fit and allows for stimulation of the G spot with every thrust. The doggy style position is also a pleasurable and yet simple sex position that allows for the clitoris to be stimulated as it is more exposed, allowing for it to be stimulated with love eggs vibrators or even manually by yourself or your partner. The doggy style also allows for exciting sexual adventures such as a threesome and allows everyone to enjoy equal stimulation.

You can lessen the weight and burn on your knees by using pillows to cushion your upper body, stomach and even knees and keeping your legs straight. Relaxing in the doggy style position also allows you to enjoy a stimulating sexual experience in a simple sexual position that can be practised by everyone.

69 Sexual Position

The 69 sexual position is one of the most simply performed positions but one of the most satisfying. It allows for simultaneous oral stimulation by a couple. Each giving the other oral sex at the same time. To begin the couple lie on top of eachother with heads away from each other and easy access to the goods of pleasure. The 69 position is one of the sexual positions that allow for the use of sexual toys and stimulation such as vibrators, dildos, mustabators and anal sex toys.


One of the coziest if not the coziest sexual position, spooning is a simple and yet satisfying sexual position that allows for ultimate intimacy. It allows you to relax and match each others rhythm and pace. A sexual position which allows both partners to feel well and truly connected in an embrace during climax. The spooning will let you lay next to each other against your back and the angle of penetration can be adjusted with the partner in the inner spoon angling their back or arching to meet the rhythm of thrust.

A very much laid back sexual position that allows you to enjoy sex without anything slipping out. Using stimulants and sexual accessories like butt plug sex toys will further enhance the stimulation and pleasure. Add novelty with blindfolds or even heighten the pleasure when partners are hands free to touch and fondle each other in other erogenous zones.

Seated Straddle

A very simple and very enjoyable sex position, the straddle allows a couple to match their breathing and expand their bodies to match each other. It is a beautiful sexual position that allows more opportunity to achieve orgasm. The intimacy of being able to look into the eyes of your partner whilst sitting face to face is only rivalled only by the missionary position.

The seated straddle sexual position also allows the couple to expand their breathing and eliminates the pressure on breathing experienced during the missionary position. Being seated is also a very natural sexual position that will allow the couple to feel very comfortable and hit their highest points of pleasure. Add tongue cockrings to as novelty to heighten the stimulation of the clitoris.

Missionary Sex Position

The classic sexual position which although looks very basic is one of the most satisfying and yet very simple to effect sexual positions: a simple sexual position that will heighten the pleasure and leave both satisfied. It is the ultimate and natural position for clitoral stimulation.

The misionary position can be furthe renhanced by propping up with pillows to angle the penetration and allow for futher clitoral stimulation. It is also an ideal sexual position for hitting the evasive G spot which allows for vaginal orgasmic explosion. The missionary sexual position can be altered with varying angles of leg positon, from closed up legs, or draped outside your partners, to even raising one leg.

The missionary position is easily achieved regardless of one’s athletic abilities, including wrapping legs around the back of your partner to create a deep and satisfying lock. Delay male orgasm with cock extenders strapons or cock rings accessories which can also serve to further stimulate the clitoris.